Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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