So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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