Joe is yelling at the trees again.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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