Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm getting married
To pizza
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
