Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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