apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize