Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
