if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
