My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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