at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
