This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize