are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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