This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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