I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
