Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
