I don't usually arrange sex via text message
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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