Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize