Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
