She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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