she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
