Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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