"it" just moved
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
