It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Randomize
