Grow some girl-balls and come out already
one might say we're banned from that church
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
