We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize