lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
