dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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