whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
We are all done wearing pants today
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
