i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
the liver wants what the liver wants
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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