Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
