At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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