tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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