Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
