That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize