Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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