I saw his package. It spoke to me.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
soo... how was my night?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize