we have officially lost it.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize