Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize