I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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