just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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