I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
