Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
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