I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
