Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
the raccoons are back...
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