in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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