Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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