I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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