I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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