i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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