I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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