Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
the night ended with taco bell and tears
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
